I raised my eyes to see how Chade was receiving such a rebuke, but he seemed intent on sorting his peas into two separate piles on his plate. He became aware of my gaze and looked up to meet it. His left eyelid slowly dropped and then opened again. I stopped chewing. Had he winked at me? Or was it part of the drooping of his features? Our glances met but his green eyes were as opaque as seawater.
Dutiful was still speaking. “I know it was hard for the Fool, but I think it was the wise decision. Perhaps he will never be as gay as he was when he was Lord Golden, but he no longer cowers in the dark. Surely that is better for him than hiding away in Chade’s dark old den.”
“What will become of those rooms?”
“Oh, eventually we will move the wardrobe in Lady Thyme’s chamber and restore the door to them. Lady Rosemary has begun to sort what is there. She told me that some of it must be handled carefully. There is no rush. An empty room or five in this rambling old castle is not as large a concern as a dragon in Bearns. Have you given any thought as to what might be done about the dragon Baliper?”
“I should be happy to help with the tidying of the old den. Rosemary is correct when she says there are items there that must be disposed of with great caution. I will see to some of them.” And many items that would be very useful to me. Already I was planning that I would do that as soon as possible. I knew of several entries to the spy-labyrinth. But now was not the time to dwell on that lest Dutiful discern the direction of my thoughts. I put a thoughtful expression on my face.
“And as to your dragon, well, there is always killing him. But as he can speak to some humans, and as he has kin among the dragons of Kelsingra, that might not be our best solution.”
“Indeed, it’s our last resort. If we kill one, my dukes will see it as the easiest solution. Right now I have forbidden any warlike actions against any dragon.”
“Well, then the only solution is to treat him as you would any ill-mannered guest. Choose what you will give him, offer it freely, and hope he is satisfied with it. Do not make him comfortable. Hope he stays only a short time.” I tried to think of a fresh solution. “Contrast the farms they raid with the ones they leave alone. Find out what conditions they prefer and don’t create them.”
“They eat so much,” Dutiful muttered in dismay.
“Too much!” Chade suddenly agreed. We both turned to him. His eyes were bright with anger. He looked directly at me. “There’s too much rosemary on this fowl! I can’t stomach it. What is worse than a journeyman cook who thinks she knows better than the master! Heavy-handed! That’s what she is!”
“Lord Chade, this is not fowl but good venison. And I taste no rosemary in it at all.” Dutiful spoke gently but uselessly to his complaint.
“Pah!” Chade pushed his plate aside. He pointed at me with a finger gone knobbly. “My boy would agree with me, I think! He never liked her stirring the pot, Fitz did not.” He slowly surveyed the room. “Where is Fitz? Where is my boy?”
“I’m right here,” I said hopelessly.
He swung his gaze back to me. “Oh, I doubt that,” he said. He took a slow drink of his wine. As he set it down, he looked at me again and said, “I know my boy. He’d know his duty. He’d feel the spurs. He’d be long gone by now, he would.”
I found a smile and patted his hand. “The impulsive boy that ran through Buckkeep Castle with a bared sword? He’s long gone indeed, Lord Chade.”
Chade twitched. For a single moment, his green eyes locked with mine. Then he smiled vacuously. “Just as well,” he sighed slowly, “though sometimes I miss him.”
In this dream, everything stank. I was in a terrible place. Animals walked about without their skins. They looked like the hanging deer in the cooling sheds, after the carcasses had bled and when the hunters stripped the hides from the meat. I do not know how I knew that, for I had never seen hunters ride to the hunt, nor deer hung to bleed before skinning. The animals were dark red and purple and pink with glistening white muscles. The worst was around their staring eyes. They could not blink.
In the streets the men and women were wearing the animals’ skins. It was so clearly wrong and yet all the folk there in Wortletree thought it the most normal thing in the world. I did not want to be there. On the water, a great seabird with broad white wings called for us to hurry. They made me go.
That night, I slept not at all. I argued with myself and then took out Bee’s book. I paged through it slowly, marveling at her illustrations and strange fancies. But not even that could distract me. Chade was right. The headstrong boy I had been would have been on his way a month ago. I reminded myself of the times when I had given in to such impulses. The first time, I’d ended up in Regal’s dungeons. The second time, Regal’s Skill-coterie had nearly killed me. I could afford no mistakes this time. I well knew it would be my last. So I inventoried my resources. My Skill was restored. My body was hardened, my weapons ready. Spring would soon break. I had seen to all at Buckkeep Castle as well as I could. I would settle my affairs at Withywoods and depart.
The next day I announced that I would return to Withywoods for a visit. No one objected. Nettle filled two panniers with gifts and tokens for the servingfolk. Perseverance would go with me, for I judged he should visit his mother and perhaps remain there.
Our travel day dawned blue and clear. I had invited the Fool to join me. He had refused. I’d expected that. What surprised me was the quiet anger in his voice as he said, “While you dither and dally, I must make ready for my journey back to Clerres. When you said you could not go with me because of Bee, I understood. When you said she was stolen, and you could not leave until she was rescued, I understood. But they destroyed our child and still you do nothing.”
He waited for a response from me, and I think my silence only made his anger deeper. “I do not understand you anymore,” he said quietly. “They destroyed our child. I lie awake and plan vengeance. I push my body to grow strong. Daily I strive for endurance. I am ready the moment that you say we are going to leave here and undertake our journey. And finally you propose a journey to me. To Withywoods.” His tone was one of disgust.
I told him the truth. “I am not convinced that your health would allow you to journey back to Clerres, let alone take the vengeance you desire. You are not ready, Fool.” I did not add that he might never be.
“Yet with you or without you, it is something I must do. I have no choice. And so I make my own plans.”
“We always have choices, even when all of them seem bad.”
“I have only one path,” he insisted. He shook his head, then reached to smooth down the cloud of pale hair that stood up around his face. His voice changed. “Fitz, I have begun to have dreams again. As I did when I was a child.”
“We all have dreams.”
“No. Not everyone has these sorts of dreams. These dreams are to ordinary dreams as drinking wine is to smelling it! They are unmistakably significant.”
“Are they from the dragon blood? I remember that you told me you had dragon-dreams. Of hunting and flying.”
He dismissed my question with a wave of his long-fingered hand. “No. Those were different. These are … Fitz, I know what lies ahead of us. In glimpses. We must be on our way. I dream of the Wolf from the West.”
He watched me carefully as he spoke. The words rang familiarly in my ears but I could not place where I had heard them before. It was my turn to shake my head. “I must go, Fool. There are things there that must be settled.”
He folded his lips. “With you or without you, old friend. With you or without you.”
And so I left him. It seemed a poor way to part and I was silent as we rode away from Buckkeep Castle. I rode a sturdy mare from the stables that did not mind the panniers. Perseverance rode at my stirrup, likewise silent. I think he more dreaded than welcomed the thought of a visit home.
Our journey was uneventful. The weather held fair; my guard was well behaved at the inns and Foxglove seemed pleased with them. As we drew closer to Withywoods my heart grew heavy and Perseverance morose. As we left the road and entered the long driveway, the drooping birches with their burden of snow arched over us and dimmed the day. At one point Perseverance turned his head and stared, and I knew that was where he had fallen to a Chalcedean arrow. Neither of us spoke of it.
We saw the burnt stables before we glimpsed the house. I’d given orders that the remainder of the barn and the bones of those who had perished there be burned on the site. Now the debris had been cleared away, leaving an ashy black area of trampled snow around the stone foundation. New timbers were rising; one end was already closed in. A bulldog came barking and snarling to meet us. A girl ran out to seize his collar and drag him back.
“It’s the master!” shouted someone in the stables, and I saw someone hurry toward the house. Several hands came to take my horse and Foxglove’s mount and direct the guard where they could stable their beasts. I released Perseverance to help them.
Steward Dixon greeted us in a coat festooned with bone buttons dyed yellow and green, obviously enjoying his elevated status. I could think only that he was not Revel. He told me that all had rejoiced at news of Lady Shun’s rescue. He hoped she was doing well, for he recalled her fondly. He hoped she would soon return. I told him quietly she was settled now in Buckkeep. He asked after FitzVigilant and said he was missed. I replied that he, too, was settled in Buckkeep. Then, in an altered tone, he lowered his eyes and said all were saddened to hear of the loss of Lady Bee. “Such a little thing she was, and still so sweet, even if she was odd. Some might say she was not meant for this harsh world.” I stared at him and he turned red. Abruptly he asked if I would rest or take refreshment, but instead I asked him to show me what had been done in my absence. I had already noted that the entry doors had been skillfully repaired.